The Night Chicago Died

I never been one for superstition, especially when it comes to my favorite baseball team, but I think it is worth pointing out that the Chicago Cubs went on a nine-game winning streak starting the day of my arrival in the CHI and ending the day I landed back in La-La Land.

So, yes, I think a little bit of Chicago died as I got on that plane yesterday.

I know I died a bit, too. It really was an awesome trip home and was great to see so many family and friends and go to Wrigley and out to the bars and everything.

And one of the best things was that this city that I know so well still surprises me and teaches me new things, so without further ado I give you:

The Top Ten Things I Learned on my Trip Back to Chicago

10. The best way to lose $150 is to walk the streets of Wrigleyville before a Cubs game, pass a couple of Chicago cops, and down an Old Style.

9. Bob + margaritas = a Tennis-baseball performance that will go down in infamy

8. If someone tells you that there is a trolley full of cute girls and free booze that is going to be driving around from bar to bar and there's no catch and it all sounds too good to be true...then it probably is.

7. Trump Tower is lookin' gooooooooood.

6. A children's game like four-square can become more intense than a UFC match with the right combination of booze, chicken parmigiana, and men with their wives/mothers/children watching.

5.There's nothing wrong with Cans.

4. When it comes to meat, it's gotta be all-natural!

3. According to the new Second City ETC show, the 1700's were really gay and boring.

2. When comes to 4 AM bars, there's the GOOD (Old Town Ale House), the BAD (Oasis), and the UGLY (Shenanigans).

1. Obama is a mack-daddy. (He pimps white women and black women).