"Me fail English? That's unpossible!"

A great injustice and incredible took place last week that is so despicable the only word I can find for it is......unpossible.

It is unpossible to imagine that "Family Guy" became the first animated sitcom to get an "Outstanding Comedy Series" Emmy nod since "The Flintstones" in 1961. And though I could up to North Hollywood and shout my displeasure at the front door of the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences, I believe my diatribe would fall on slightly more receptive ears here.

Now, I will admit that right now, in 2009, the average "Family Guy" episode is probably funnier than the average "Simpsons" episode, but that does not excuse the Academy from setting a historical precedent just because they need a ratings grab for their failing award show.

Because clearly, that is all that this nomination is. It's the Emmys wanting more viewers so they've expanded the field to include a wider audience - the Oscars are doing the same thing by having 10 Best Picture nominations next year (I have my own thoughts about the Oscars, especially which categories I think they should cut, but I'll save that for another day). "Family Guy" earn this distinction is as blasphemous as building a monument to Jesse Jackson while uttering "Martin Luther who?" (my words, not his). MacFarlane gave the appropriate tip of the cap to "The Simpsons" after finding out "Family Guy" had gotten the nomination and he said "The Simpsons" should have won in the 1990's.

And to be clear, it's not as though "The Simpsons" went home empty handed in their heyday. Matt Groening an Co have trucked home enough Emmys to fill Mr. Burns' mansion since their first nomination for "Outstanding Animated Program" in 1990. The show has gotten plenty of respect for its writing, voice talents, musical score, etc. BUT, having been the most culturally relevant animated show since "The Flintstones", they definitely should have had the distinction of being the 2nd animated show in TV history to earn a nomination for "Outstanding Comedy Series".

Maybe I'm so fired up because "The Simpsons" was my first true love in a long, tumultuous affair with sweet madame TV...causing me to abandon the fresh air and sunshine of childhood for the cool, comfortable surroundings of the basement at 156 Montclair. And though saying that "The Simpsons" is the genesis for my even being out here in the Land of La-La might be a bit of stretch, it certainly played a major role. I would say that "The Simpsons" is probably why I have a better sense of humor than I do a mean breaking ball. Who knows? If the family at 742 Evergreen Terrace had never entered my life I might have been a middle reliever for Sweet Lou's bullpen....(which, in its current state, could still be a possibility).

I could go on for pages and pages about why I love "The Simpsons" (and very well may in future posts), but for now I just had to let off some steam.

Besides, I'm really not THAT pissed off. "The Simpsons" are like Coca-Cola or the '96 Bulls team - they are the best their ever was or will be with absolutely no debate (thought the idiotic media will always insist on trying).

I'm especially at ease because "The Simpsons" already got the last word over 17 years ago. In the episode "Brother, Can You Spare Two Dimes?", Homer is given $2000 because working at the nuclear power plant has drastically reduced his sperm count, and Mr. Burns decides to silence him with the $2K settlement, but fools him into thinking he's won the "Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence". The award is presented at a ridiculously overdone awards show, and after seeing the over-the-top opening musical number, Bart and Lisa have this exchange:

LISA - This awards show is the biggest farce I ever saw.

BART - What about the Emmys?

LISA - I stand corrected.